Well surprise surprise Dr. Mody Alkhalaf or anyone from citizens affairs has not replied to my e-mails or calls. It seems like once they recognize the e mail or person calling they ignore you!! My son is almost 3 years old and the man who fathered him seems to keep flying under your ever so vigilant radar. This specific student has exceeded his scholarship multiple times due to poor grades often times he has been in so much academic trouble you suspended his allowance.Why are you protecting this man? Who can answer my questions?????
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It has been over a week since anyone in the embassy has returned any of my numerous e mails or calls. Below is the last correspondence between us.
Dear Jennifer
I did transfer your request to the embassy and you may follow up with citizen’s affairs.
I would like to note that when we talked, however, you were very keen on the father not having any paternity rights, in fact you mentioned that your husband has “adopted” your child as his son and you do not want to change that.
Also, you never mentioned anything regarding child support. In fact, you said I just want to make sure who to contact when my son grows up and wants to meet his father.
Having said all that, and if you have changed your mind regarding what you are requesting from the father, then I will gladly note it to embassy as well.
Sincerely,
Dr. Mody Alkhalaf
Director of Cultural and Social Affairs
Cultural Mission of the Royal Embassy of Saudi Arabia
8500 Hilltop Road
Fairfax, VA 22031
Phone: 571-327-2555
Fax: 571-327-2761
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Where I quickly replied.
Dr. Mody Alkhalaf
Thank you for your response. I certainly appreciate it, and will do my best to clarify. My concerns were mostly of a financial nature, as Sultan has repeatedly tried to avoid doing anything to help in that area. My husband has indeed adopted our son, and we have no other needs of Sultan, other than to ensure family medical histories are available to us. I didn’t bring it up before because I was under the impression that Sultan would be gone in another month’s time. This is five months later and he is still here ( having broken into my home at one point in time, might I add ). Nothing else has changed, although I would like some clarification on citizen’s affairs. All I could obtain there was a list of phone numbers. What is the next step, and is there anyone specifically that I should speak to? I appreciate the time and effort. Thank you.
Jenniffer
My latest e-mail to the Saudi Embassy in Washington, DC.
In the past I have been in contact with Dr. Mody Alkhalaf Director of Cultural and Social Affairs.To date nothing had been done to resolve this situation.
To whom it may concern,
My name is Jenniffer I called you six months ago regarding the situation involving myself, my son, and his biological father, Sultan Abdullah Asiri, who is currently a computer science major at the University of Findlay. At the time of my call, you told me someone would help me to a resolution within 1 month, and that it was simply too expensive to send him home just short of his degree. It has been an additional 5 months, and not only is he still here, living a mere 5 minutes away from me, but he has offered absolutely no financial support whatsoever. I have started a group, called Saudi Children Left Behind, as a type of support system for women in my position, and have found that there are numerous women in the exact same predicament as myself. We are attracting new members every day, and have even been contacted by media outlets for interviews. My concerns remain the same as when I first contacted you. What will I tell my son, who will be three in May, about his biological father? Why are so many men on international scholarship allowed to skirt their responsibilities when they father a child? My son’s DNA would without a doubt answer any doubts anyone would have about his heritage, but I would still like to hear from you before speaking to the media. I await your response.
Sincerely,
Jenniffer
Saudi Children Left Behind 
I would suggest a letter with multiple signatures and that the letter be sent in both Arabic and English. It may be better to have your letter sent to the Saudi Ambassador. He, in turn, may delegate it to someone else but there would be more pressure riding on getting a response.
The letter should be short and concise and clear.
Good luck.
That is a great idea. I will start working on that thank you 🙂
They should be ashamed of thesemelves..5 months and he is still in america..awww but wait if he had actually married u and the saudi embassy has found out..all hell would have broke loose and they would have sent him back immediately.
Such hypocrites..I don’t think you should wait too long for a response from the embassy before contacting all media outlets..that usually gets saudi officials listening.
I think American Bedu’s idea is really good as well..
Good luck with everything and i hope the next time u post it is with good news!
Thanks for sharing your story I’m sure u are giving hope to many girls out there who feel helpless.
I’m glad you exposed his name.
Carol’s idea is great try and get as many signatures as possible! I know there are hundreds of cases like yours out there, but women sadly are afraid to come forward..
The shame is on the men!! these are Muslim men coming into a country on scholarships, knowing they are not allowed to have relationships, but they still do. Most of these women are not Muslims and are fooled to trust these men who just wanted sex in the first place. Come a child and he runs like a coward.
These men are just that, cowards. they should fear Allah, but they don’t!!
Why don’t you just expose the names of all these men in an interview and get the word out! If their families find out that would be the only way to make them act. The embassy is mostly useless and don’t care. But come family name/honor, the stakes are much higher!
Laylah I am currently working with a young woman from Arizona university who is doing a documentary on this very subject, The filming begins in May and hopefully by Summers end she will have her project wrapped up. This Documentary will from what I understand will be presented to the King.
I am sorry but I do not agree with what you are doing. I don’t care what, but you can never force a man to be a father no matter what if they don’t want to be. I think you should move on with your life and raise your child as well as you can. I find it rather ridiculous that you would want to get his country involve just because he does not want to take responsibility for the child. If he was from another country would you do the same? I know Saudis are not suppose to have relationships once they are on scholarship and being Muslim they should know better, but leave that to GOD to judge he will have to answer for his sins on his own. Every thing always happens for a reason.
Believe me, no matter what just try to move on. He is the one that is missing out on his child’s life. Forgive me if I sound harsh but my biological father or sperm donor as I call him, lived right next door to my mother’s house when I was little and he NEVER once took the time out to ask whether I was dead, alive, hungry, whether I had clothes on my back or shoes on my feet. However, my mother kept on going and found a great man that I consider to be my father. He has raised me since I was 7 years old and many times I even wish that he was my biological father because he is such an amazing man. As for my sperm donor I want absolutely NOTHING to do with him. He is a dead man to me and my life is sooo great without him!
Don’t bother yourself in trying to make this man to be a father to your child if he does not want to. When your child grows up he will see what type of person this man is.
I certainly agree that you cannot force a man to be a father, should he not choose to be one, and this is not our intent. But there are certain responsibilities the biological father has, both financially and health-wise, that they absolutely need to accept. It is deplorable for some of these men to leave undue financial burden on mothers who are taking sole care of these children, and unacceptable that they would disappear without their medical records being available for illness searches within family histories. It is not okay for someone to walk out of those responsibilities, simply because they don’t want to be a parent. And yes, the nationality of the man really makes no difference. I have simply noticed that within the Saudi community this seems to be a much more widespread problem, and thus we are trying to bring attention to it from whomever may be able to help. You are certainly correct in that men who choose to help take care of children are much more deserving of the title of father. What is needed from these men is not fatherhood, it is the basic decency to take care of what is certainly their responsibility, for the health and well being of an innocent child.
I’d like to add that it may be very difficult to learn of a family’s medical history. Saudis are very private and especially if there are any kind of health issues.
I understand about the family history part as this is very important. However, I think you should forget about the monetary part and just raise your child on your own. Getting money every month from a man he may not ever even get to know is not going to bring happiness to your child. Remember you chose to give this child life too and It is the way you raise him that will make him a happy child.
Once again I hate to sound harsh, but my mum to me is my hero. She worked several jobs just to be able to put clothes on my back and so that I would not go hungry. She never once asked my sperm donor for money and I am glad she never did. He can never claim that he indirectly helped to raise me by contributing financially, and if she could raise me on her own for 7 years, in a country where at the time if you still lived in your parent’s home and you got pregnant out of wedlock you were looked down on, you can do it on your own too. It may be hard at first but I know you will make it.
So why not just try to get his family medical history and leave it at that. Never turn your child against him and when he grows up he wants to know more about his father or even meet him let him do it. Conversely, if his father eventually comes to his senses and would want to be part of his child’s life let him. Just don’t force him into it even financially.
We are going to disagree on this issue for a a couple of reasons. The first being that there are many who don’t consider “giving this child life” a choice. The child has life, and the choice would be whether to take it away. I support a woman’s right to chose, but could never take away the life of a child. And there are numerous women out there who have to scrimp and save every penny to provide for their child. There is no way I could live with myself if I didn’t do everything humanly possible to provide for my child, so they never have to worry about where their next meal might be coming from, or if they are going to lose their home. if the biological father has decided not to be a part of the child’s life, I can’t stop that, but I am damn sure not going to protect his feelings or worry about inconveniencing him financially. He is not my concern, my child is, whether or not he wants to carry around a mental torch claiming he supported his child in some way. My duty is to help my child have the best life possible, and that is what I am going to do. If the father “comes to his senses” as you say, he should have to figure out that a child’s life is not a revolving door to enter and exit whenever it seems convenient.
i didnt know you were remarried. i read your story wrong then on the embassy letter.and the letter you wanted translated, what is that for? hard to read it. is it a birth record for your son
Hello Rei
Yes I married a wonderful man, he is such an amazing father and husband.The letter I needed translated is a page from my sons baby book that his biological father wrote in for my son. I had always wondered what it had said.
I was very surprised to discover this website. I too, have a grown daughter whose father is from Saudi Arabia. Yes, we were married in the U.S in 1979. He left the country when she was two months old, and we never heard from him again.
The main thing that breaks my heart is that my beautiful daughter is 32 years old and is still affected by the abandonment by her father.
I always thought maybe one day he would try to find her. Otherwise, I would have lied and told her that her father died rather than to subject her to the truth.
I am so sorry for what you and your daughter have had to endure. I fully understand how painful it is to have a father who abandons you at a young age it is something you can never get over.
I would love to tell you and your daughters story if you are interested please feel free to contact me at saudi_children_left_behind@hotmail.com
We have had some luck in getting information on the fathers of these children that are now themselves adults. This is also a wonderful way to give you and your daughter an outlet and a voice.
If formally on your sons birth certificate you have the saudis father name then you can certify it from the US and translate it in arabic. Then through the embassy they would need to send a request for registration of birth to civil affairs that would also confirm nationality. Neverteless as the situation stands with no marriage the civil affairs would not approve and would send you back through the embassy either a rejection or request for proof of marriage even if it was done without the official permission ( for the childs registration it would still be ok)
Mind you though you would need to have a copy of his national id to initiate this process or at least a copy of the passport. They usually would send the request to the central civil affairs department of his city. Have you tried?
I went to the Saudi Embassy on December 2013… I brought all the papers that proves that Sulaiman is Sami’s father, also copies of his ID’s, etc., and all they said was “Ok we are going to send it to Riaydh and will contact you soon – Hamad AlRasheed” but guess what? I am still waiting for they response and everytime I call they just ignore me and leave me waiting a lot until i end up hanging up the phone. And all I asked for was to please tell Sulaiman to sign Sami’s papers to get his freedom back and register him in my country. I don’t think i was asking a lot.