Author Archives: Saudi Children Left Behind
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We were recently contacted by Shaima a young single mother who originates from the Philippines. After a relationship with Makki she became pregnant. Here is her story.
Were both nurse in one hospital. Were together for about 11months before I get pregnant. After i confirm that i am pregnant i told him everything. and he get angry he told me that i need to abort my pregnancy or he will leave me. Then we start to fight and i didnt agree to abort my baby coz im afraid to god. I convince him to accept the reality that we will become parent soon but he never accept it after fighting with him for almost 2weeks i decided to go back to philippines and continue my pregnancy. Then i inform my family about my situation of course they are upset and angry with me because i did a big haram in my life were muslim as expected they are blaming me. But they accept everything. Before i leave saudi he talk to me and say he will help me for all i just need to inform him what i need. But later on everything change again but i dont mind it coz i need to prepare my self for my delivery. He never contact me for 2months. I deliver my baby via CS and i pay all my expenses and hospital bills. When the time come that i dont have enough money to support my baby i ask his help then he start to help me for 4months only then he never contact me again i try to contact him but he blocked all my numbers i dont know what happen then i decided to call his parent to inform everything but i failed coz his parent doesnt believe me. I was so upset and stress dont know where i can find money to support the needs of my daughter my family somehow help me for my daughter but still there is blaming part. This was very difficult part of my life. I dont know what i can do to support my daughter then i decided to go to saudi again to work and then i try to talk with him again and convince him to accept his daughter but he never accept. Then we never talk again its been 3yrs the last time i talk to him my daughter now turning 4yrs old and started to ask about her father but i dont know how to answer all of her question. Its hurt every time i saw her looking at other kids with there father it melt my heart coz i know what she feels. Now i decided to stay with her here in philippines coz i dont like her to feel that she dont have family. Im the only one who suffer more while her father doing nothing making his life better and not thinking about her daughter.
The WordPress.com stats helper monkeys prepared a 2013 annual report for this blog.
Here’s an excerpt:
The Louvre Museum has 8.5 million visitors per year. This blog was viewed about 130,000 times in 2013. If it were an exhibit at the Louvre Museum, it would take about 6 days for that many people to see it.
This subject has been in my mind lately, not only solely based on my own situation but that of those Saudi kids out there (and non-Saudi ones alike) that were deserted, things and situations which we all at some point or the next have been forced to endure.
Growing up abandoned, unwanted, sad, angry. Left alone in an unforgiving world to fend for ourselves. Ask many of these kids alike and our stories are all the same. Some of these other kids I grew up around would later go on to battle addiction with drugs, alcohol, bouts of severe depression, and homelessness along with other extreme habits and conditions, such as repeated run-ins with the law; issues which very commonly arise as the end-result when one has been left behind by the one person they might have needed the most.
Some of these kids I knew not only were left in very dire circumstances like me and my mom were, but were also left with a parent that was unfit to raise their child, by themselves or let alone, AT ALL. These children were subjected to various forms of abuse by the single parent adults left to care for them, as well as the parent’s dysfunctional associations. These same kids would eventually later on grow up with severe behavioral problems, along with many other unfortunate characteristics.
With no concrete set of values, beliefs, affection…or much of ANYTHING positive instilled in them during those early years when its most crucial to the formation of the child many kids that fit our category are left as sitting targets.
In my case my mother was very young when she had me and, thankfully, ruled with an iron will. She gave me the belief of God early on, but this didn’t mean it made our situation any easier. The damage had been done..first to her then to me. Because she was a mere teenager when she had me and had come from a background of cultural struggles herself, she was still attempting to find her own way. Now as a single parent things for her were tough, to say the least. Most of her problems became my problems..her stresses my stresses. During those crucial early years of formation I was afraid and stressed. Left alone with fear of even my own shadow, living day to day in a constant state of panic.
Stress that big at 4 years old is extreme. Worried about where we are going to live at 4 years old is extreme. How our rent is going to get paid or where my next meal is going to come from at 4 years old is extreme. What kid should be thinking about these matters at that age?? These extremes can and often do lead to later ones…extreme behavior. Destructive patterns during teen years and beyond, which was the case in my own life. To mask the pain and anger one begins to experiment with various forms of intoxicants to self medicate and this is where things can become really dangerous.
Today, with adulthood and renewed belief in myself, I continue to climb and combat the negatives and said extremes but the long lasting effects of the damage done from then til now can be very difficult to shake free of.
But, again, what happens when the child has been left with NOTHING to believe in. Never taught, never acknowledged, never cared for. No chance at self esteem or peace….
What becomes of them now and later on down the road?
In November 2012 the Saudi Embassy issued a statement that they were going force DNA testing on the men who were thought to have fathered a child while studding abroad. Saying that if these men refuse testing their scholarship will be revoked and they will be sent home to face possible jail time. This appeared to be a step in the right direction and a small victory to the women and children who have been effected.
The WordPress.com stats helper monkeys prepared a 2012 annual report for this blog.
Here’s an excerpt:
About 55,000 tourists visit Liechtenstein every year. This blog was viewed about 1,100,000 times in 2012. If it were Liechtenstein, it would take about 20 years for that many people to see it. Your blog had more visits than a small country in Europe!
Looking For Her Father
Kimberly B. is 46 years old and has never met her father. She has never felt the warmth and strength of her father’s arms hugging her. She’s never heard the sound of his voice. She doesn’t even know what her dad looks like, although she must resemble him because she looks nothing at all like her mother’s side of her family. Kimberly has gone through her entire life up to this point wondering and dreaming about her father, longing for a connection. She has scant information about him, but she is hoping it’s enough to help her find the father she has longed to meet all her life.
Abdulrahman Al-Omran (or El-Omran) is from Saudi Arabia. In the mid-1960s, he traveled to the United States to pursue his college education. At the time he was a young man in his mid-20s. Described as tall, dark and handsome, Abdulrahman enrolled at Clark College in Vancouver, Washington. It was here that he met Kimberly’s mom, Diana Divine, a gorgeous 20-year-old part-time model with curly brown hair and brown eyes who was studying business. The attraction was immediate.
Diana quickly became infatuated with Abdulrahman – she loved his brown skin, his easy sense of humor, and the charming way he always teased her. They fell in love. When Diana became pregnant, Abdulrahman wanted to marry her and take his young family back to Saudi Arabia with him, but Diana was afraid of moving there. Kimberly was born in January of 1966. She was adopted at birth by Diana’s sister. Diana thought this would be the best thing for her baby.
Abdulrahman moved away to continue his schooling at UCLA, eventually graduating in 1970 from Santa Clara University in California. Kimberly believes he studied Physics, Math, and Science, and Diana recalls that Abdulrahman told her he wanted to become an engineer for ARAMCO. Diana (pictured left) and Abdulrahman eventually lost touch. She believes that Abdulrahman’s father was in the import-export business and the family was well-to-do. Diana also remembers that Abdulrahman had several brothers, one of whom was named Aziz. Aziz might have been one of Abdulrahman’s roommates in nearby Portland when he attended Clark College.
Kimberly has always had a fascination with Middle Eastern culture, art, customs, and history for as long as she can remember. The only possession and reminder that she has from her father is a prayer rug that he left for her. She longs to know more about her Saudi father and his family and wants her own three children to know about their Saudi ancestry. She has tried for many years to locate him, but to no avail. Her interest in locating him is natural and honorable and would satisfy her lifelong dream of meeting her father. She also feels that knowing her father’s medical history would be useful.
Says Kimberly, “My father probably has a wife and many children. I would just like to meet him and have him meet his grandchildren. I have always wanted to know more about where I come from. I have had an identity crisis being raised in a Western ‘Caucasian’ family that I don’t always fit into. I was told I look just like him – I do not look like my American family at all. And I sense that I am a lot like him. I naturally relate more to the Arabian side than to my mother’s Irish- English side. I love my family but I feel something is missing that is a big part of who I am. I sometimes feel lost because I was not raised in my real culture. I was told his family is wealthy, but material things do not matter to me. Making a personal connection to him is much more important to me. I am ok with the fact that he may not want to know me or acknowledge me. I would be happy just seeing a picture of him. If we find each other and he doesn’t want to be a part of my life, I am prepared for that. I just have this feeling that he would want me to find him. I can’t explain why I feel drawn to him as though he wants to be found. “
Today Abdulrahman Al-Omran would be about 66-70 years old. He probably lives in Saudi Arabia somewhere. He might spell his last name as El-Omran. It is not known what area of Saudi Arabia he is from. If you have any information about the whereabouts of Abdulrahman Al-Omran, please email me at: firstname.lastname@example.org
Many thanks to a reader, who was kind enough to translate this post for the Arabic speaking readers out there.
تبحث عن والدها
كيمبرلي (في الصورة أعلاه) تبلغ من العمر 44 عاماً و التي لم تجتمع قط بوالدها السعودي الجنسية عبدالرحمن العمران. كيمبرلي لم تشعر بالدفء والقوة التي تمنحها إياها معانقة والدها لها. انها لم تسمع صوته بل لا تعرف حتى ماهو شكل والدها ومن يشبه، على الرغم من أنها يجب أن تشبهه لانها تبدو مختلفة تماماً بل على الإطلاق مقارنة بوالدتها وعائلتها التي قامت بتربيتها. قضت كيمبرلي حياتها حتى هذه اللحظة تتساءل وتحلم بوالدها ، والشوق للقاءه يأسرها. لكنها لا تملك معلومات عنه الا القليل و لكنها تأمل انها كافية لمساعدتها في العثور على والدها الذي تتوق لرؤيته طيلة أيام حياتها.
عبد الرحمن عمران (أو العمران) من المملكة العربية السعودية. سافر إلى الولايات المتحدة لمتابعة دراسته الجامعية في منتصف الستينات 1960، في ذلك الوقت كان شاب في منتصف العشرينات. يوصف عبدالرحمن بأنه رجل وسيم طويل القامة ، أسمر البشرة إنضم إلى كلية كلارك Clark College في مدينة فانكوفر بولاية واشنطن. ومن هناك التقى بوالدة كيمبرلي ديانا ديفاين بـشعرها الأجعد البني وعيناها البنية و كانت تعمل كعارضة أزياء لجزء من الوقت و تدرس تجارة في الوقت ذاته كـ طالبة منتظمة بالكلية. عندها كان الإنجذاب بين عبدالرحمن و ديانا مباشراً.
و سرعان ما فتنت ديانا بـ عبد الرحمن فقد احبت بشرته السمراء ، و خفة ظله ، و الطريقة الساحرة التي كان يغازلها بها. و وقعا في الحب ! وعندما إكتشفت ديانا أمر حملها أراد عبد الرحمن أن يتزوجها و يصطحب عائلته الصغيرة مرة أخرى إلى المملكة العربية السعودية، لكن ديانا كانت تخاف من الذهاب إلى هناك. ولدت كيمبرلي في كانون الثاني لعام 1966 وعند ولادتها طلبت أمها من أختها أن تتبناها حين ولادتها لتضمن لها مستقبلاً أفضل.
انتقل عبد الرحمن بعيدا لمواصلة تعليمه في جامعة كاليفورنيا ، وتخرج في نهاية المطاف في عام 1970 من جامعة سانتا كلارا Santa Clara University في كاليفورنيا و تعتقد كيمبرلي انه درس الفيزياء و الرياضيات ، والعلوم. و تتذكر ديانا أن عبد الرحمن قال لها انه يريد ان يصبح مهندسا لشركة أرامكو السعودية. ولكن في نهاية المطاف فقدت ديانا أي وسيلة إتصال بـ عبد الرحمن و ذكرت إنها تعتقد أن والد عبد الرحمن كان يعمل في مجال الأعمال التجارية، الإستيراد و التصدير. ديانا تتذكر أيضا أن عبد الرحمن كان له إخوة عدة ، واحد منهم كان اسمه عزيز أو عبدالعزيز و ربما كان واحدا من شركاءه في السكن في بورتلاند Portland قريباً من كلية كلارك.
كيمبرلي كانت دائما مبهورة بـ ثقافة الشرق الأوسط ، و الفن ، و العادات العربية ، والتاريخ بشكل كبير. الشيء الوحيد الذي تملكه كيمبرلي من والدها للذكرى هي سجادة الصلاة التي تركها لها. و قالت إنها تتوق لمعرفة المزيد عن والدها السعودي وعائلته وتريد أن يعرف أطفالها الثلاثة أصولهم السعودية. و قد حاولت لسنوات عديدة تحديد مكان إقامة والدها ، ولكن دون جدوى. تقول كيمبرلي أنه من المهم تحديد مكانه وهذا شيء طبيعي بل مشرف أيضاً لـ ترضي حلمها مدى الحياة من لقائها بوالدها. وقالت إنها تشعر أيضا أن معرفة تاريخ والدها الطبي سيكون مفيدا لها.
وتقول كيمبرلي “ربما والدي لديه زوجة وربما كثير من الأطفال. أود فقط الاجتماع معه وحمله على لقاء أحفاده. اردت دائما معرفة المزيد عن أصلي. لقد كان لدي أزمة هوية عنيفة حيث نشأت في أسرة أميركية لا تصلح لي. و كانو دائماً يخبرونني أني أشبه أبي لأني لا أبدو كـ عائلتي الأميركية على الإطلاق. و انا اشعر أيضاً بأنني أحمل الكثير من الشبه بأبي. أنا أميل بطبيعة الحال أكثر إلى الجانب العربي من ميلي لجانب أمي الايرلندية الإنجليزية. أنا أحب عائلتي لكني أشعر أن هناك شيء مفقود هو جزء كبير من هويتي. أشعر أحيانا بالضياع لأنني لم أنشأ في ثقافتي الحقيقية (ثقافة والدي). قيل لي أن عائلته ثرية، ولكن الأمور المادية لا تهم بالنسبة لي. إجراء اتصال شخصي بوالدي هو أهم بكثير بالنسبة لي. أنا مدركة للحقيقة أنه قد لا يريد أن يتعرف إلي أو يعترف بي. و سأكون سعيدة لمجرد رؤية صورته. و إذا وجدنا بعضنا البعض ، وإذا كان لا يريد ان يكون جزءا من حياتي ، فأنا على استعداد لذلك. أنا فقط يتملكني شعور انه يريدني أن أعثر عليه. و أنا ليس بمقدوري تفسير شعوري المندفع بأنه يريدني أن أجده.”
اليوم من المتوقع أن عبد الرحمن العمران يبلغ من العمر حوالي 66-70 سنة ومن الأرجح أنه يعيش في مكان ما في المملكة العربية السعودية. و من الممكن أن يكون إسم العائلة يكتب على هذا النحو El-omran و ليس لدى كيمبرلي او ديانا معلومات عن مكان معيشته تحديداً.
إذا كان لديكم اي معلومات عن مكان وجود عبد الرحمن العمران ، يرجى الكتابة على العنوان التالي